Detoxing from ABUSE

India White • January 18, 2022

Detoxing from ABUSE- Dr. India White

Detoxing from ABUSE- Dr. India White

     Abuse is defined as, “use (something) to bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse; treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly. treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly.”


     So many times, we’ve seen ads on the internet regarding domestic violence. Usually there is a woman that is curled up, who has just taken a blow in the face. These ads typically make people feel bad, and they try to figure out how they can help those in their inner circles who are being mistreated. Children also are told to report any mistreatment to officials at schools, and educators are mandated reporters.


     Everyone knows abuse is just…wrong. However, not all abuse or mistreatment is physical. Much abuse is mental and emotional. This can be in the form of taunting, name calling, bullying, blackmailing, ignoring, racism, unfair wages, stealing from others what is rightfully theirs for someone else’s profit, and the list continues.

     

     We know that we are valuable as individuals. However, to “fit in” to this society, many have been persuaded that they have to suffer at the hands of various abusers. People tolerate those who desire to tear them down and deceive them just to have “acceptance”. Then, they walk away from that transaction, feeling ashamed, humiliated, and tricked out of what was theirs.


     This can happen in business, institutions, church organizations, schools and more. This abuse is no respecter of persons, and it happens more often than not. The sly abuser will usually approach you with a smile. No harm intended they will say. However, they will slander your name, rip you off, steal from you your ideas, and will leave you high and dry. Then, they’ll smile at you and say, “We’ll see you next time!”


     My question is, “When is enough…enough?” When will the abuser see that they are wrong?” The unfortunate answer is, “It will never be enough.” You see, abusers will take from you as long as you allow them to, no matter what their title is. Abusers can be business leaders, pastors, professors, teachers and more. This is why people are shocked when they read about some mishap in the community, and they wonder how “that” person got caught up into it. Abusers are in every area, some are just tougher to spot.


     I can recall several incidences where people will approach me to support, speak, lead…however, they had a hidden agenda. They wanted to profit off of my talent, my story, and I wouldn’t receive a dime. Or they used me because I helped them “appear” to have diversity. Some people just wanted a conversation so they could build their businesses from my ideas. However, I didn’t realize that I was surrounded by abuse, until I pulled back enough to realize that I did not gain, but I was taken advantage of. It just didn’t feel right once I left them. I share this because I want everyone reading this to know that you have probably encountered someone that has been through something similar, and I want to help give strategies to help detox from abuse.


Here are some tips to detox from abuse:

1.    Cut off their energy

      If you have noticed that someone, or a business leader, a church leader continues to use you, manipulate you, take advantage of you, and you always feel burned out, rejected, humiliated after you leave them…cut them off. Your “vibes” are not lying; something is not right, and you deserve to feel love. If you know someone is going through the same situation, help provide them the supports they need so they too can be free from the manipulation, mind control, false love, and overall abuse.


2.    Forgive Them

      At the end of it all, abusers are really going to lose out in the end. They may profit now, but everyone has a day in which they will give an account. Hence, forgive them so you can move forward and heal. Throughout the bible are plethora of examples of people who were abusers. There was the story of Saul and David. Saul was jealous of David, who was younger than him and chosen. Hence, he would smile in David’s face and then try to kill him. He was so miserable with David, that he never supported David in anything he did. His entire time knowing David, he aimed to destroy him. Scripture talks about the thief will come to steal, kill, and to destroy. However, God came so that you would have life and that more abundantly (John 10:10). Hence, choose to forgive, and keep God in the midst of your heart and enjoy your peace.

 

3.    Start Fresh

      It is okay to take the same ideas that others stole from you, and start a new thing! It’s okay to cut off toxic people and groups, and start over! You do not have to explain yourself to anyone. You are accountable to God. Choose to start fresh. You are only one person, and the last thing you need is to be so bent up emotionally from abuse, stress, manipulation, control and false love that you can’t see the good in your life. Cut off the negativity and start fresh.

 

4.    Choose to have JOY

      Scripture speaks about how God will give you joy unspeakable and full of glory. This is great to know because it keeps you focused on where your true joy comes from. It’s not in digital currency, and it’s not it the things of this world. Joy is not in false friendships, and control and manipulated relationships. Joy happens whenever you have a peace in your mind and spirit that you are fulfilling the purpose that God has for you, and that you are being sustained by God. Joy is when you know you have done right by others and can sleep at night. This is something that you and I cannot fabricate. People try to replace joy with events, parties, yoga, incense, and more; however, joy comes from above.


Conclusion

           You were not made to be abused; you were made to be loved and to soar. Hence, take off the cloak of abuse. Forgive those who mishandled you and cut off their negative energy. Choose to start fresh and always keep your joy. The best is yet to come, so detox from their abuse, and continue to soar forward. May God be with you! 


By India White June 29, 2025
From Rotten Moments to Sweet Blessings: What Banana Bread and Fermented Foods Teach Us About Life Sometimes life hands us what feels like rotten bananas; situations that seem spoiled, broken, or beyond hope. Maybe it’s a tough season of loss, failure, disappointment, or uncertainty. Yet, just like those overripe bananas transform into delicious banana bread, or milk ferments into nourishing cheese and yogurt, our "rotten" moments have the power to turn into something sweet and life-giving. Why Rottenness Can Be Good In the culinary world, fermentation, a process that uses “rottenness” to transform foods , creates some of the healthiest, most flavorful staples we enjoy: yogurt, cheese, sauerkraut, kimchi, and more. This “rottenness” isn’t waste; it’s a powerful agent of change that unlocks nutrients, improves digestion, and promotes health. Similarly, life’s difficult seasons are not the end. They are part of a process— a fermentation of our character, faith, and grit When we lean into these moments with grit—great resilience in time—we develop strength, wisdom, and sweetness in our souls that wouldn’t be possible otherwise. 7 Ways to Overcome a Negative Mindset and Embrace Grit in Rotten Seasons 1. Acknowledge Your Feelings Without Defeat It’s okay to feel hurt, frustrated, or discouraged. But remember, these feelings don’t define you. Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.” 2. Shift Your Perspective to Growth View challenges as opportunities for learning and growth. Romans 5:3-4 reminds us, “Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” Just like looking at a bunch of rotten bananas can seem discouraging until you shift your thinking and see them as a perfect ingredient for banana bread, choose to see your moments of rottenness as a game changer for your destiny! 3. Practice Patience Through the Process Good things take time— like fermentation and baking . Wait on God’s timing. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything.” Think of how spoiled milk seems disgusting and gut wrenching, until you learn of how wonderful of an ingredient it becomes for homemade cheese! Trust the process, and know that it will all work out in your favor! 4. Cultivate Resilience by Staying Connected Surround yourself with supportive people who encourage you to keep going. Galatians 6:2 teaches, “Carry each other’s burdens.” Sometimes, that person might be the catalyst for a new direction, new energy and exponential success. 5. Focus on Small, Consistent Steps Break down overwhelming problems into manageable pieces. Z echariah 4:10 encourages, “Do not despise these small beginnings. ” Don't lose sight on your progress, your identity or your purpose. 6. Renew Your Mind Daily Replace negative thoughts with truth and hope from Scripture. Philippians 4:8 advises, “Think about whatever is true, noble, right, pure.” Remember that God is not dead, and he sees exactly how his plan in your life will manifest. Leave your worries on the throne and know he will justfiy you. 7. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection Every small victory is a sign of growth and sweet fruit to come. J ames 1:12 says, “Blessed is the one who perseveres.” Just as you are making banana bread, cheese, yogurt and other wonderful foods, you know that there might be bumps along the way, but keep pressing on! The final product is worth the moments of struggle disappointment and rottenness. You will smile in the end. Conclusion Remember, just as rotten bananas, milk, and vegetables become nourishing foods through a process of transformation, your tough seasons are preparing you for a sweeter, stronger tomorrow . Stay gritty, endure the process, and trust that God is turning your struggles into something beautiful. For more encouragement and practical ways to build grit in your life, visit my website at www.india-white.com . You can also watch my TEDx Talk, The Power of G.R.I.T., for a motivating boost to help you keep pushing through life’s challenges. Keep rising. Keep growing. Your sweetness is coming.
By India White June 27, 2025
๐Ÿš€ Ready to Get Pumped Up About Life Again? ๐ŸŒŸ Listen to my TEDx talk, and let’s reignite that fire inside you! ๐Ÿ”ฅ It’s time to get serious and start making those dreams happen! ๐Ÿ’ช Don’t let anything hold you back—embrace the grit and determination needed to turn your aspirations into reality. Join me on this journey to unleash your full potential! ๐ŸŽคโœจ #drindiawhite #grit #DreamBig #TEDxTalk https://youtu.be/R9YQOtryL7w?si=vvp_rSqMP3J2VNQ_ (I don’t own music copyright)
By India White June 27, 2025
Join us on the Grit and Equity Talks with Dr. India White, featuring Choosing to See Co-Author and Equity Expert, Dr. Pam Seda! #drindiawhite #pamseda #choosingtosee #equity #icucareframework #nctm #ncsm
By India White June 27, 2025
๐ŸŒŸ Exciting News! ๐ŸŒŸ I’m thrilled to announce that I’ll be co-presenting at CAMT with the amazing Peter Liljedahl from Building Thinking Classrooms! Join us for our session where we’ll dive into empowering students to transition from perseverance to productive struggle. Let’s transform challenges into growth opportunities together! ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ’ก #CAMT2025 #BuildingThinkingClassrooms #Education #StudentSuccess #drindiawhite #btc #grit #tedx NCTM - National Council of Teachers of Mathematics NCSM: Leadership in Mathematics Education #camt25 (I don’t own music copyright)
By India White June 23, 2025
Dear Educators, Principals, and School Leaders, I’m excited to share that my latest newsletter has just arrived, filled with inspiring updates, resources, and tools to support your teams and students in building a culture of G.R.I.T.—Growth, Resilience, Intentional Self-Efficacy, and Time Management. As you plan your professional development sessions, conferences, or school events for the upcoming year, I’d love to partner with you. Whether it’s a keynote, workshop, or interactive training, I specialize in helping educators and school communities cultivate grit, equity, and empowerment in ways that are practical, engaging, and transformational. If you’re interested in having me speak at your school, district, or conference, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’d be honored to serve your team. You can also explore my speaking topics and G.R.I.T. resources at: www.india-white.com Let’s connect, collaborate, and inspire greatness—together! Here's the link to my newsletter to share: https://www.canva.com/design/DAF_21LSLwQ/sEqABtI7pY0-Gh5vSzQnLg/edit?utm_content=DAF_21LSLwQ&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link2&utm_source=sharebutton Warmly,
By India White June 23, 2025
Thank You, Nevada Association of School Administrators: Building a Culture of G.R.I.T. Together I want to extend my deepest gratitude to Adam Lane and the Nevada Association of School Administrators (NASA) for the incredible opportunity to speak at your recent conference. It was truly an honor to engage with such passionate, forward-thinking educational leaders who are committed to transforming schools and communities. During our time together, we explored a theme close to my heart: creating a culture of G.R.I.T.—not just in the classroom, but throughout our communities. We unpacked the G.R.I.T. Framework, which focuses on cultivating Growth Mindset, Resilience, Intentional Self-Efficacy, and Time Management in both educators and students. These four pillars are foundational for student success, especially in today’s challenging and ever-evolving educational landscape. We also discussed the critical role educators and school leaders play in modeling and reinforcing these values. From building trusting relationships to ensuring equity and access, educators are the heartbeat of our communities. When we lead with empathy, authenticity, and grit, we empower students to do the same—and we create schools where every learner feels seen, supported, and capable of greatness. To the school leaders, superintendents, and administrators who attended: thank you for your engagement, your insights, and your commitment to building a legacy of perseverance and purpose. I walked away inspired by your stories, your questions, and your unwavering dedication to improving outcomes for all students across Nevada. If you're interested in learning more about the G.R.I.T. Framework or want to access tools like the G.R.I.T. Workbook, I invite you to visit www.india-white.com/what-does-grit-mean-to-you ] And if you missed the session or want to revisit the message, you can also check out my TEDx Talk: The Power of G.R.I.T. Thank you once again, Adam and NASA, for giving me the platform to share this mission and for all you do to champion student success across Nevada and beyond. Let’s continue lifting others as we climb—one gritty step at a time.
By India White June 23, 2025
Embracing Grit and Community in Education: Strategies and Insights for Teachers As I reflect on both shared and individual childhood experiences, I am reminded of the incredible power of grit, the passion and perseverance that fuel our journeys. Yet, one important question remains: What happens when grit alone isn't enough? In our classrooms, many students face systemic barriers that grit alone cannot overcome. That’s why it’s essential for educators to understand that grit must be supported by community, self-efficacy, and equity-driven practices. Understanding Grit in the Classroom Angela Duckworth defines grit as a sustained commitment to long-term goals despite obstacles. But through my own work and the development of the G.R.I.T. Framework, I’ve found that true grit includes more than persistence. It’s also about Growth mindset, Resilience, Intentional self-efficacy, and Time management—all supported by a strong community and a belief in one’s ability to succeed. To learn more about this approach, check out my TEDx Talk: ๐ŸŽฅ [ “The Power of G.R.I.T.” TEDx Talk ] And if you're looking for practical tools to implement in your classroom or school community, you can explore and download the G.R.I.T. Framework and G.R.I.T. Workbook on my website, www.india-white.com ๐Ÿ“˜ Let’s explore how educators can integrate these principles to help every student not only persist—but thrive. 1. Cultivate a Supportive Community โœ… Build Relationships Create a safe, inclusive environment by getting to know your students. Invite them to share their stories and experiences to strengthen classroom trust. โœ… Use Storytelling as Empowerment Lean into Rudine Sims Bishop’s concept of mirrors, windows, and sliding glass doors—letting students see themselves, others, and opportunities through storytelling. Representation matters. 2. Acknowledge Systemic Barriers โœ… Name the Inequities Be honest about the social, economic, and cultural challenges your students may face. Acknowledgment leads to empowerment and helps normalize discussions around equity. โœ… Share Your Journey Talk about your own privileges and struggles. Vulnerability builds bridges and shows students that growth is possible; even through adversity. 3. Empower Student Leadership โœ… Promote Collective Agency Encourage students to be “ genius influencers ”—train them to see themselves as leaders who support one another and recognize their ability to shape positive change in their communities. โœ… Foster Collaboration Group work and peer learning cultivate community resilience and affirm the idea that we rise together. 4. Embrace Culturally Relevant Teaching โœ… Make Learning Reflective Design curriculum that reflects your students’ lived experiences and cultures . This combats bias and validates identity for all learners (Ladson-Billings, 1994). โœ… Encourage Critical Consciousness Help students think deeply about social justice, equity, and their own role in fostering inclusive environments. 5. Build Strong Mathematical Identities โœ… Promote Belonging in Math Create learning spaces where every student—especially those with disabilities or marginalized identities, which this helps students feel capable, celebrated, and seen . โœ… Use Real-World Connections Ground math in everyday experiences. When students see how math connects to THEIR world, they’re more likely to engage meaningfully. This helps to eliminate any invisible barriers and mistrust in the classroom. 6. Implement Dr. India’s G.R.I.T. Framework :) โœ… Foster Self-Efficacy Help students set achievable goals and celebrate small wins. Confidence grows when students believe their effort matters, and that you believe in them. โœ… Build Support Networks Facilitate relationships with mentors, peers, and community members who can serve as allies in your students’ educational journey. (Don't underestimate the power of community) Learn more and access the full G.R.I.T. Framework and accompanying workbook at: ๐Ÿ”—( https://www.india-white.com/what-does-grit-mean-to-you) Final Thoughts: My Humanity Is Tied Up in Yours; We're in this Together! The journey of teaching is deeply human. Every interaction we have with students—every lesson, every word of encouragement, every challenge we help them overcome—shapes not only their lives, but our own. Let’s recommit ourselves to teaching with grit, grace, and empathy. Now, here are some Teacher Action Tips for your consideration: Make space for storytelling in your classroom. Reflect on and address systemic inequities regularly. Facilitate peer support systems. Use culturally relevant texts and lessons. Set and celebrate realistic goals with students. Show students they matter—every single day. References Duckworth, A. L., Peterson, C., Matthews, M. D., & Kelly, D. R. (2007). Grit: Perseverance and passion for long-term goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92(6), 1087–1101. Sims Bishop, R. (1990). Mirrors, windows, and sliding glass doors. Perspectives, 6(3), 9–11. Ladson-Billings, G. (1994). The Dreamkeepers: Successful Teachers of African American Children. Jossey-Bass. White, I. (n.d.). G.R.I.T. Framework. Retrieved from [www.india-white.com](https://www.india-white.com/what-does-grit-mean-to-you) TEDx Talk: [The Power of G.R.I.T.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9YQOtryL7w&t=1s) Together, we can build resilient, empowered learners—one gritty classroom at a time. ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ“š #GRITinEducation #EquityInLearning #CulturallyRelevantTeaching #StudentEmpowerment #TeacherLeadership #GrowthMindset #DrIndiaWhite
By India White June 23, 2025
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By India White June 23, 2025
Join us fo r the latest episode of the Let's Get Gritty Podcast with Dr. India White!
By India White June 18, 2025
๐ŸŒŸ Just wrapped up an enlightening session on the sense of belonging at the NCTM - NCTE Joint Conference! ๐ŸŽ‰ As educators, we explored the crucial distinction between fostering a culture of inclusion versus facing feelings of dejection in our classrooms. It was inspiring to see so many passionate teachers engaged in this important dialogue. Let's continue to strive for acceptance and enrich the learning environment for all students! ๐Ÿ™Œ #drindiawhite #inclusion #dejection #acceptance #nctm #ncte #LitMath25 #bwxme #NAACP (I don’t own copyright to music or background)
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